Let’s talk about a wedding-day decision that comes up a lot and can feel a wee bit loaded: should you do a first look?
If you haven’t heard the term before, a “first look” is when you and your partner choose to see each other before the ceremony - just the two of you (plus me, lurking nearby with a camera, likely crying behind the lens). It’s become more popular over the past few years, and for good reason; but like everything with weddings, it’s not a must. It all depends on the vibe you want for your day. So if you’re feeling a wee bit stuck - hopefully this blog post helps you to decide what feels right for you.
The case for a first look.
There are some beautiful reasons as to why you should do a first look on your wedding day. For many couples, it offers a quiet, private moment to soak it all in before the ceremony kicks off. Here are some of the key perks:
You get some quality time together before the chaos begins (and boy oh boy, she’s a whirlwind of a day!). The rest of the day will fly by - this might be one of the only moments where it’s just the two of you.
It can calm the nerves. If one or both of you is feeling anxious about walking down the aisle, being the centre of attention, or just the big-ness of the day, seeing your person first can be a real grounding moment. It means you can rock into your ceremony with a whole lot of hype and excitement, minus the anticipation.
You get to knock out your portraits early. Doing your couple portraits (and even bridal party shots) before the ceremony means more time afterwards to mingle, relax and soak it all in - especially if your ceremony runs into the golden hour and you want to chase that dreamy Wellington light.
Logistics. If you’ve got a tight timeline or a big venue to move between, a first look can help spread out the schedule a bit more and ease the stress of cramming everything in after the ceremony.
Things to think about
That said, a first look isn’t for everyone. It really depends on how you want the emotion of the day to unfold. Here are a few things to consider:
Do you want to share that emotional moment in private, or in front of your guests? Some people dream of that aisle moment, where everyone turns and the music swells and you see each other for the first time. It’s goosebump-worthy, every time. Some people want the happy tears and the big reveal moment, and if that’s your vibe, go for it!
What’s the timeline of your day? If you’re planning a late afternoon or evening ceremony and want daylight portraits, a first look might be the practical choice. But if you’re happy to do golden hour photos later, or plan on a longer gap between ceremony and reception, you’ve got more flexibility.
Will it take away from the ‘walking down the aisle’ moment? Some couples worry that if they’ve already seen each other, the ceremony might feel less emotional. In my experience? Not a chance. You still get that heart-stopping moment - but without the nerves.
If you skip it and go traditional:
That’s absolutely beautiful too. Plenty of couples opt to keep the tradition and wait to see each other until one of you is walking down the aisle. It’s always, always magic. The room goes quiet, hearts thump loudly and there's this breathless moment where everything else fades away. Truly iconic.
To make it work, though, I recommend:
Building in time post-ceremony for portraits. You’ll want to allow at least an hour for couple and bridal party shots, especially if you’re moving locations or chasing a sunset.
Factoring in Wellington’s quirks. The light changes quickly here, and the wind has a mind of its own. I can help you plan the perfect time and location so the vibe (and the veil) is on point.
The bottom line - first look or no first look?
Whatever you choose - first look or traditional reveal - the most important thing is that it feels right for you. There’s no “right” way to do it, just like everything with your wedding day. My job is to support your decision, help craft a timeline that flows and be there capturing all the big, emotional, laugh-crying moments either way